Sunday, February 4, 2024

When There Is No Healing

I once had a patient with A.L.S., better known as Lou Gehrig's disease, though today the most famous person who had it was physicist Stephen Hawking. The nerves controlling the muscles deteriorate within the brain and spinal cord. The person gradually loses control, first of his limbs and finally of the ability to swallow and to breathe. My patient was confined to her wheelchair. She was still able to use her hands but had no strength in her stick-thin arms. She could never get comfortable in her chair even with her gel cushion seat. So she was always asking to be lifted and shifted a bit. After doing so for the umpteenth time, her husband often lost his temper and yelled at her in frustration, leaving her in tears. Then he would apologize and kiss and adjust her. The nursing agency I worked for was concerned about the potential for physical abuse but I never saw any. What I saw was a man who loved his wife enough to stay and take care of her. They had two grown sons in the neighborhood but they never came over to give their father a break. Her husband was flawed but he was there. Many men leave their lovers, spouses, and even their children if they are suffering from a chronic illness. Guys like things they can fix. They don't do well when it comes to coping with a persistent health problem. On the Facebook ME/CFS page many women are grateful for husbands and partners who stay and do so much for them when they can do so little.

In today's gospel reading (Mark 1:29-39) Jesus makes healing look easy. Peter's mother-in-law has a high fever. Jesus takes her hand and helps her to her feet. She is not only cured but well enough to wait on the disciples. Compare this to the prophet Elisha trying to resurrect a child in 2 Kings 4:8-37. It's hard work for him. There's almost an improvisational quality to his efforts. He even gets up and paces as if thinking of what to do next. But eventually the child is revived.

We think, “Well, sure, it was easy for Jesus. He's the Son of God.” But it wasn't always easy. A little later in his gospel, Mark tells us of Jesus healing a blind man. He spits on the man's eyes and lays hands on him. When Jesus asks the man if he can see anything, he replies that he sees people but they look like trees walking around. So Jesus puts his hands on the man again and he sees clearly. (Mark 8:22-26) Out of the 23 healings spotlighted in the gospels, at least one did not happen immediately.

Well, there is another story where Jesus' healing of someone was delayed. When he is confronted by the possessed man living in the tombs, the demons ask Jesus not to torture them. They say this, Mark tells us, because “Jesus had said to him, 'Come out of this man, you evil spirit!'” When it doesn't come out immediately, Jesus asks its name. The chilling reply is, “My name is legion for we are many.” Then the demons plead with Jesus again. Finally he sends them into a nearby herd of pigs, who suddenly drown themselves. (Mark 5:1-20) Whether you accept that the man was demon possessed or mentally ill, it took a while for Jesus to heal him.

Mark tells us that the situation was even worse when Jesus visited his hometown of Nazareth. The people he grew up among were skeptical. Mark says, “He could not do any miracles there, except lay his hands on a few sick people and heal them.” (Mark 6:5) That's quite a contrast with Capernaum, Peter's town and eventually Jesus' new homebase. Mark says that the whole city came to Peter's door. Even so it says Jesus healed “many.” (Mark 1:33-34) It doesn't say Jesus healed all. What would prevent the Son of God from healing?

In Nazareth, it was unbelief. Mark says, “And he was amazed at their lack of faith.” (Mark 6:6) Often when someone is healed, Jesus says that their faith made them whole. And he meant their faith or trust in him or in God working through him. The best doctor in the world can't cure a patient who doesn't trust him and let him work. So, too, God cannot work on us if we hold back and will not work with him. It is not that faith is magical; it's that trust is the foundation of a healthy and healing relationship. God is love and love doesn't force itself on anyone. We must open the door to God, all the doors to all the areas of our lives, if we wish his grace to flood in. A flower kept locked away from light will never bloom but will wither and die. Lack of faith can block healing.

But that faith need not be completely without doubt. When a man whose son has seizures asks Jesus to heal him “if you can,” Jesus says that everything is possible for the person who believes. “Immediately the boy's father exclaims, 'I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!'” (Mark 9:24) We often find ourselves in that position. We do trust in God but we still have doubts. We wish to be wholehearted believers but we have trouble doing so. So are we doomed to failure? Not necessarily. Jesus does heal the man's son. The key is that the man is honest about his struggle with doubts but he is open to change. He wishes to increase his faith and that's enough for Jesus to work with.

Notice that it is not the boy's faith but the father's faith that is in question. Only in 1/3 of the recorded healings of Jesus is the patient's faith mentioned. Jesus often heals people through the faith of their friends, family or even bosses. When some men tear the tiles off of Peter's roof so that they can lower their paralyzed friend to Jesus, Christ looks at their faith and forgives the man, healing him. (Mark 2:5) We are not told of the man's faith, only of that of his resourceful friends. That provides the channel for Jesus to work.

So does that mean that sick people who don't get well either don't have enough faith or enough friends? No. It's not the amount of faith that's crucial, but its presence, as we saw with the father of the sick boy. Jesus said that all you need is a mustard seed's worth of faith to move mountains. (Matthew 17:20) God can work miracles if given the smallest opening.

Still, it is obvious that not all believers are healed. In his second letter to the Corinthian church, Paul talks about a “thorn in the flesh” that bothers him. Commentators throughout the ages have speculated as to what it was. Some have guessed that it was his adversaries, or sexual temptation or a speech impediment. But many feel it was an illness. It may have been malaria or epilepsy or some eye disease. Paul does mention that he was ill when he preached to the Galatians and he says that the Galatians would have torn out their eyes and given them to him if they could. (Galatians 4:13-15) We also know he dictated his letters (Romans 16:22) and when he signs them he uses big letters, as if he can't see well. (Galatians 6:11) But whatever that thorn in the flesh was, Paul prayed three times that it be taken away. But it wasn't, and not due to lack of faith.

The reply Paul gets from God is “My grace is enough for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Now Paul has characterized his thorn as a messenger from Satan that torments him. It is evil and yet God allows it. Why? According to Paul, it keeps him from being arrogant. He realizes that the gospel's success is not based on his charisma but on Christ's power working through him. (2 Corinthians 12:7-9)

So God makes us suffer so we won't be proud? No. Remember that Paul did not think his problem came from God but from Satan. But God can use what is evil for our own good. Now I would never tell someone that God was using their illness or misfortune for their good. But many people suffering from illness or misfortune do discover that some good can come out of it. Illness can remind us of our mortality, of how precious life is, of how we are not rulers of the universe but part of it and subject to its physical limitations.

Richard Pryor had a horrendous childhood. The son of a prostitute, he was raised by his grandmother who ran a brothel. When he became a successful comic, he used his money to fuel an unbelievable drug habit. He was severely burned free-basing cocaine and nevertheless returned to drug abuse. Even a series of heart attacks did not cause him to curb his self-destructive lifestyle. Then he got multiple sclerosis. Thereafter he used his time to get to know his many children from his many marriages and liaisons. Again, I would not tell him that God did this to him. As we said, disease is considered an evil in the Bible. But Richard himself said that M.S. was God's way of saving his life. C.S. Lewis once said that pain is God's megaphone to get the attention of a world that has become deaf to his voice. Pain shatters the illusion that all is well with us and that we are the masters of our fate.

The fact is that sometimes the answer to our prayers for healing is “No.” And we do not always know why. But that doesn't mean that God is angry with us or has abandoned us. Jesus rejected the idea that disease or disabilities or disasters are always due to sin. (John 9:3; Luke 13:4-5) To be sure, some physical problems are the result of injuries we do to ourselves but not all.

Not only can the sufferer often find meaning in his weakness, but so can his family and friends. Illness can bring out the best or the worst in the sufferer's circle. As I said, some leave. Some exploit the sick, taking financial advantage of the elderly. In the bizarre syndrome called Munchausen's By Proxy, a parent will deliberately make her healthy child sick in order to get the attention and good will and financial gifts of others.

But illness can also bring out nobility, self-sacrifice, tenderness and ingenuity in caregivers. It can bring people together. An illness in a family can make it more closely knit. But not if they blame themselves or each other or the victim. The key to making something good out of illness or disability is to first exorcise blame and guilt. See it as Jesus did, as an opportunity to glorify the God who is love.

For the caregiver, that can mean giving comfort and help. Make a meal, do some chores, give medicine, give a bath. For the caregiver's friends, it can mean showing practical compassion. Give the caregiver a break, do the shopping, babysit, do their taxes, give them rides to the doctor, or raise money for a cure.

For the sufferer, glorifying God can mean transcending their problem. Offer it to God, work around it, minister to others who suffer. Just his week my Google alert turned up a news story about a woman with ME/CFS who, though bed-ridden for decades, started and runs a charity called Rest Assured, that organizes food deliveries, support and comfort for other people who have her condition or fibromyalgia. A misery shared can be a weight cut in half. Often someone who has endured a certain pain or sorrow can help others in the same situation more effectively than someone who's healthy.

We are to pray for our healing and that of others. But when healing does not come, it is our opportunity to show that our prayers are not merely words. It costs us but a little time to pray for someone to be healed. When they aren't, then we must show if we really mean what we say and care for the person's wellbeing. Are we willing to give up more time and some labor or some emotional support and perhaps spend some money to help that person?

And if I pray for personal healing and my problem remains, do I abandon God? Do I show that my faith is superficial and that I am only into God for what I can get out of him? How would we feel about someone who only sticks with us when things are going well and dumps us when things get tough and don't go their way?

Prayer is more than words. It is an expression of our desires and values to God. What we do is as much a form of prayer as what we say. Perhaps more so.

Finally, we must remember that our faith in God is not limited to this lifetime. If it were, as Paul says, we are all the more pitiful. (1 Corinthians 15:19) In this life, in this world, fractured and contaminated by the misuse, abuse and neglect of God's creations and creatures, we are going to have suffering. No one is exempt. Not even Jesus. (Isaiah 53:5; Matthew 8:17) But our hope is in the kingdom of God, which now is a seed but which will bloom into glorious flower in the life beyond this life. In his kingdom, God's will is done and his will is that we be made whole, morally, spiritually and physically. (Revelation 21:4)

Disease and disability are not signs of God's displeasure with us, just as the apparent wellbeing of some people is no sign that he favors them. He sends the sun and rain on everyone, good or bad. (Matthew 5:45) God loves us regardless of our condition. And we must trust that what he does is ultimately for our lasting benefit. A baby doesn't understand why her mother holds her down while the doctor stabs her with needles. To the infant this seems like a betrayal and an unwarranted infliction of pain. But later, when a virulent germ attacks her, she will be immune to its worst effects. Throughout history, anywhere from a quarter to half of all children used to die before their fifth birthday. The single greatest reason that life expectancy has increased is because of vaccinations. When I was a kid, the scar left by the smallpox and TB vaccinations were a sign of our parents' love for us. But try telling that to a baby screaming in pain from the doctor jabbing them with needles in their softer parts.

We are but infants in understanding God's ways. But based on what he has done for us in the past, based on the suffering he has endured for us, we can trust that our wounds, like the ones he chose not to heal on his own hands, feet and side, are signs of his love.

This was preached on February 9, 2003. It has been updated a bit.

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