For a
while there was a vogue in Tweets labeled #firstworldproblems,
recounting difficulties most people in the third world wish they had.
Like “The air conditioning in my Audi does not work as well as my
wife's BMW.” Or “My Apple Watch didn't register the correct
distance on my 10k around Regents Park.” Or “Asked for strawberry
chantilli in my Acai and received chocolate instead.” I got these
from a website named first-world-problems.com. Which apparently is
defunct since the last post was June 19, 2015. So you can add another
first world problem: “I registered a domain name for a hot
trend that suddenly went cold.” The idea is that we are so
fortunate in the affluent West that our biggest problems and
annoyances seem trivial in a world where the majority of people make
less than $2 a day and are dealing with problems like poverty,
hunger, war, human trafficking and the like. We don't know how good
we have it.
Although
on some levels we don't have it as good as some places, like the
Scandinavian countries or Canada or the Netherlands. The US doesn't
even make it into the top 10 happiest countries as rated by the
Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development. Nor the list
created by the UN. Nor the one created by the Gallup Poll. In fact
Gallup's methodology is probably the best because rather than looking
at educational levels and economics and various official statistics,
which led to the other lists being exclusively made up of northern
European countries, Gallup simply asked people how they felt the day
before, whether they had laughed or smiled, if they were well-rested,
if they felt as if they were treated with respect, if they had
learned something interesting and whether they had felt enjoyment.
Based on the answers people gave them they rated Paraguay as the
happiest country, followed by Colombia, Ecuador, Guatemala, Honduras,
Panama, Venezuella, Costa Rica, El Salvador and Nicaragua! Of the
typical members of the other top ten lists of happiest nations only
3, Switzerland, Canada and the Netherlands, cracked the top 20 spots
in the Gallup poll. And the United States was rated above Denmark and
Finland, which usually rank higher in the other lists. Plus in the
World Health Organization's list of countries with the highest
suicide rates, Finland and Iceland rate higher than most European
countries and higher than the US. You might be surprised to find out
that Monroe County has the highest suicide rate in Florida, despite
our beautiful weather, water, flora and fauna. One possible
explanation is that if you are feeling depressed anyway, being around
a bunch of happy people makes you feel even worse.
My
point, besides a caveat on believing surveys of nebulous things, is
that one's emotional state is affected not just by what you have but
your attitude towards it. A year after winning the lottery, those
people are just as happy or unhappy as they were before. In
fact studies have found that money can only buy happiness up to the
point where you can comfortably take care of your basic needs. People
who make more than that amount are no happier. A recent study showed
that having more frequent sex made you happier—but only up to once
a week! Having sex more frequently than that did not increase
happiness. So if you lack these basic things, you are likely to be
unhappy. But ultimately it's not how much you have but how much you
value what you have. It is about gratitude.
People
reading the Bible for the first time often get the impression that
God is insecure because he asks for all this praise and thanksgiving.
But really it is for our sake. Science shows us that in fact
gratitude benefits the one expressing it. Of the many habits that
cultivate happiness one of the most important is being grateful.
Because to be thankful for what you have, you have to look at
specific elements of your life and see them as enjoyable and helpful.
You also have to realize that things could be worse, that you are
better off than you could be. In other words, being grateful gives
you a sense of proportion. However imperfect it is, your life is not
the worst one ever. There are also good things in there and you
really should be thankful for them.
Psychologists
have found that a simple but profound way to raise people's spirits
is to keep a gratitude journal. At the end of each day, write down 3
or more things for which you are grateful. They can be large or
small, things that happened that day or ongoing states of being,
events or abilities or people who have had a positive impact in your
life. People who do this faithfully for 30 days straight tend to find
themselves to be more optimistic, to spend more time exercising, get
longer and more refreshing sleep, and to have fewer symptoms of
physical illness. They are more likely to help other people and to
make progress toward their personal goals. And all this comes from
what we might call “counting your blessings.”
It is
interesting that being more grateful leads to helping others, because
Jesus very consciously, when being asked what is the greatest
commandment, threw in the second greatest as well. Loving God should
lead to loving others. And again guess who benefits? Scientists found
that if people performed 5 acts of kindness in one day, they received
the same benefits of increased well-being as those who kept a weekly
gratitude journal. And altruistic activity is another scientifically
verified element of happiness. Being kind is more important to being
happy than a high IQ or having more education. Martin Seligman, one
of the major figures of the science of positive psychology, says, “As
a professor, I don't like this, but the cerebral virtues—curiosity,
love of learning—are less strongly tied to happiness than
interpersonal virtues like kindness, gratitude and capacity for
love.” And again the Bible anticipates this by urging us to be
generous and compassionate towards others. It is truly better to give
than to receive.
We
humans do have a tendency to fixate on negative things, to be
ingrates and to focus on ourselves and not want to expend the energy
to help others. So we really need to make an effort to be grateful
and to go out of our way to be of aid to other people. That means
doing so on purpose. And having a purpose in life is another
scientifically validated element of happiness. Drifting through life
might make good fodder for introspective novels and indie films but
it's not good for real people. Having a greater purpose for what you
do gives your life and your struggles and even your triumphs meaning.
It gives your talents focus. It gives you perspective. It gives you a
direction. It gives you a goal or goals.
For
Christians following Jesus give us purpose. Using our gifts to show
our love for God and for others as Jesus does, spreading the good
news of God's love and forgiveness and peace, letting his Spirit work
through us and shape us into his image, joining with others to
reflect our multifaceted God in all we think, say and do makes our
lives more than just eating, sleeping and working. It means we
matter, others matter and what we do in this world matters.
It is
only right that we thank God for all that he has made and all that he
has done for us. It is only right that we help one another. It is
only right that we have a purpose in life, especially one tied to the
other two. But who would have thought that gratitude, kindness and
purpose would also be key elements of what makes us happy?
And
that gives us an insight on God and his rules. They are not
arbitrary, nor are they like the rules your ancient Aunt Clara has
for where you can sit and how you can behave when you visit her
house. God rules are simply the operating instructions of life. They
are reflections of his nature and the nature of the universe he has
created. Some things are bad not simply because he decided they
should be but because they go against the way we and the world are
meant to work. Some things are good not because God fancies them but
because they facilitate and work in harmony with how we and the
universe are meant to function. What is morally good is also good for
us in the long run. Saying no to that extra slice of pie may feel
like deprivation at the time and exercise may seem like torture while
you are doing it but ultimately they benefit you. In the same way
refraining from indulging in certain dangerous pleasures and
investing time in helping those who can't pay you back rather than
chilling with Netflix may not feel like fun but you will ultimately
be glad you made those choices. Praising God for all he is and
thanking him for all he has done, coming to the aid of others, and making
becoming more Christlike your purpose are good for us and and for all
people. And when you let yourself really get into them they feel
good, too. As the psalmist says, “O taste and see that the Lord is
good!” (Psalm 34:8)
Thanks
be to God!