Aristotle referred to man
as the “rational animal.” Aristotle
was overstating things. While it's true that, as far as we know, no
other animal creates symbolic logic or does scientific research or
debates theology or ethics or politics, we are not nearly as rational
as we like to think. Scientists have put people in fMRIs and asked
them tough moral questions and seen the emotional centers in the brain
respond faster than the rational parts. It seems we usually make
decisions based on our “gut” feelings and then use our verbal
reasoning to justify what we feel. This is what happens regardless of
whether one is liberal or conservative, religious or atheist,
educated or not. Which is one reason why, moral psychologist Jonathan
Haidt points out, otherwise good people can disagree on what is right
and what is wrong. Our positions, especially on things we value the
most, are felt first and then we act as lawyers for the stances we
have adopted emotionally.
Knowing
this makes explicable opinions that seem unfathomable. It also
explains why people's most deeply held beliefs are the ones which
they have the hardest time articulating. It just feels right. It explains why all the
logic in the world can't budge some people's opinions.
The
fact that we are not ultimately as rational as we hoped we were would
not surprise Paul. He was rational enough to notice that this
conflict between truth and emotion did not merely occur between
people but within people. And that is what he is talking about in our
passage from Romans 7. He is exploring a problem we all wrestle with:
why don't we do what is right, especially when we know it is best for
us? It's not that we like to do evil; we detest it. And yet we find
ourselves being drawn to the same sins over and over again. It's not
rational.
This
is the primary problem we encounter in life, isn't it? We know our
anger gets us into trouble, we know or should know from experience
what triggers us and yet we find ourselves ramping up to another
destructive outburst. Or we know we are terrible with money, we know we
will spend it the minute we get it, and here it is another payday, we
have outstanding bills, and yet we hear the siren call of what we
really want to spend it all on. Or we know we are untrustworthy around
the opposite sex, we know we will shamelessly pursue an attractive
person, regardless of whether they or we are married, and yet we find
ourselves flirting with someone new despite the fact that we already
are in a good relationship and this will ruin it.
We are
not dumb. We know what the right thing to do is. We know what the
smart thing to do is. We know what the rational thing to do is. And
we just can't seem to bring ourselves to do it. It's isn't a matter
of ignorance. It is a matter of desire.
When
our dog breaks a rule we have labored to teach him, we sigh and say,
“Well, he's just a dumb animal.” We can't say the same about
ourselves, though. We know better. We have big brains that should be
capable of telling us when to say “no.” Or maybe they do and we
ignore them, walking into trouble despite the large, clear warning
signs life is showing us. How else do we explain the umpteenth CEO
caught in a sexual harassment suit? How else do we explain the
countless respected politicians caught trying to cover up things
that should have been obviously career-ending in the first place? How else do we explain
TV evangelists doing the very things they preach against Sunday after
Sunday? We ask ourselves, “What we they thinking?” The answer is: they weren't.
Somebody
once said that if you wanted to predict what an organization was
going to do, you should imagine it is secretly controlled by a cabal
of its worst enemies. And you know what? It works. Want to know what a political party's
next move is? Imagine it has been infiltrated by members of the
opposition who want it to lose the next election. Or imagine that a
charity has been taken over by people who want to destroy it by
spending the money on things that will make folks look for something
else to contribute to. I swear a bunch of Apple employees went
undercover at Microsoft to ensure that Windows 8 would be so bad it
would drive customers to buy Macs. How long have cars had ignition
switches that worked fine and who at GM thought this needed to be
tinkered with? Why is it that in the 21st
century we have printers that can scan, copy, fax and do everything
except reliably pull a piece of paper through itself without jamming?
It all makes sense if you simply imagine these companies are
controlled by their worst enemies.
Perhaps
they are. As the old comic strip Pogo so astutely paraphrased Julius
Caesar, “we have met the enemy and he is us.” We are often our
own worst enemies. We all know people whose chief talent seems to be
snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. Heck, I've tried to help a
few people like that. I've met people who never get along with anyone
and blame each and every one of those people for their problems
rather than themselves. And they can't see the improbability that
their frequent trouble with others is never their fault.
We
have trouble seeing our moral flaws. We are biased to see ourselves
as the good guys in our interactions with others. We judge ourselves
on our intentions, whereas we judge others on the actual results of
their actions, regardless of their intentions. Our intentions however
are always pure and noble. "Chelsea needed a reality check and so I
was merely being honest, not cruel." "I wasn't careless; Jeff shouldn't
have been standing where he was." "We always tell our clients that
there's risk involved; they should have paid attention rather than
accusing us of deception."
Naturally
we need to see and be honest about our faults if we are to have any
hope of fixing them. But few people can be that objective about
themselves. They keep running into the same self-generated problems
and chalk it up to the same run of bad luck or incompetent people
they are forever encountering. They themselves are the least likely
suspects in this ongoing mystery.
Some
folks are able to figure out that they are deeply if not fatally
flawed. It happens to those addicts who seek recovery. They have
what they call “a moment of clarity.” They see their lives and,
more importantly, they see themselves as they really are. All
illusions, all delusions, all pretenses are stripped away. The light
floods in and they see their true colors. It is literally sobering.
Sins
are rather like addictions. They enslave us, bind us to behaviors
that may have given us pleasure in the past but now just promise
pain. I didn't believe in sex addiction until I heard a man describe
how he would turn down invitations to go out with friends in order to stay home and call sex lines, how he'd stay up into the wee hours viewing pornography
despite having to go to work the next day, and how he'd risk arrest and
STDs cruising for prostitutes. He said that when it's an addiction it
no longer fun or enjoyable. It is a compulsion that causes
self-loathing.
Which
sounds like what Paul is describing. “I do not understand my own
actions. For I do not do what I want but I do the very thing I hate.”
That describes addiction. But Paul at this point is talking about the sin of
coveting, which weirdly enough was not a problem until he heard the
commandment against it. It had not occurred to him to long for the
things that belonged to his neighbor until then. I don't think the
impulse was not there; it's that the first whiff of the fragrance of
the forbidden fruit awakened his dormant desires. Suddenly he could
think of nothing else. It consumed him.
We've
all been there. We learn of something we'd never heard of before and
the next thing you know we are yearning for it, as if it were a long
lost love. Nobody sets out to get hopelessly enslaved to drugs or
joyless sex or the never-satisfied pursuit of wealth or the
impossible demands of envy or self-righteous anger or
self-destructive behavior. Nobody says “I want this one thing to
dominate the whole of my life. I want it to leech all of the joy out
of everything else in my life. I want this to become the thing to
which I will sacrifice all chances of true happiness that come my
way.” It starts out small, a one time indulgence. But like a cancer
it grows and takes over and eventually it crowds out all else that is
healthy in life. Thus what we intended to do “just this once” or
“just on weekends” or “just at home” or“just among friends”
infiltrates and warps our whole lives.
Paul
says, “I can will what is right but I cannot do it. For I do not do
the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do. Now if I do
what I do not want, it is no longer I that do it but sin that dwells
within me.” Neuroscientists know that everything we experience, do
and think create connections between neurons in our brains. When we do something
over and over, we create habits by making connections or pathways to
the reward centers in the brain. These pathways bypass the reasoning
centers of the brain, like the prefrontal cortex. Which is precisely
what Paul and all of us experience when we activate one of these
pathways: it is not us, at least not the rational part of us, that is doing
this. The bad behavior which we have reinforced is in the driver's seat. The part of us that knows better is at war with the part of us
that just wants what it wants.
These
changes in our thinking are literally written in our flesh, as Paul puts it; that is, in the
physical structures of our brains. When we indulge in bad thoughts,
words and works, we reprogram our brains. But unlike a computer we
can't just uninstall these programs. They become malware which
infects our hard drive and eventually causes all our other
programming to glitch.
What
we need is new programming. We need to install the Spirit of God to
root out the bad programs we have allowed to run. We need to reset
our programming. Or as Paul puts it in Romans 12:2, “be transformed
by the renewing of your mind.”
Can
something non-physical change something physical, like the brain? Of
course, it does so all the time. You read or hear words that resonate
with your life and various neurons make connections. The words become
something you memorize, something you quote, something you live your
life by. Or you have an insight or a vision or a revelation that
changes your perception of your life or the world. That makes the
neural connections, perhaps even a continuing series of connections
that changes not just how you think but how you speak and how you
act.
We see
this in 12 Step programs. The first step is all about realizing and
admitting that the person is powerless over whatever it is that has
made their life unmanageable. The second step is acknowledging that a
power greater than oneself could restore one's sanity. This leads to
the third step: making a decision to turn one's will and life over to
one's God. Or as one AA member summarizes the first 3 steps: I can't.
God can. I'll let him. The words trigger changes in thinking, which in
turn trigger changes in actions.
But
even the 12 step programs don't rely on words alone. The key is to
truly turn one's life over to God. It's like going to a doctor and
getting a diagnosis. That's vital but it's only the start. Then you
need to get and follow a treatment plan. Which means changing your
life. Back in college when I was in a skid row ministry I was shocked
by how readily some of the men admitted to being alcoholics. But they
never went beyond that. The word was merely an excuse not to do
anything about their drinking. It was a cop-out.
For
Christians admitting to being sinners is Step One. Then we move to
Step Two, acknowledging that God can change us. And Step Three is
acting on that. It's asking God to come into our lives, allowing his
Spirit to move in and start making changes. Without his power in our
lives, all our words are merely sounds.
There
is a part of Step 3 I haven't touched on. Bill W., one of the
founders of Alcoholics Anonymous, got a lot of his ideas from the
Oxford Group, a Christian movement started by Lutheran minister Dr.
Franklin Buchman. But Bill was having problems with the idea of
turning to God until a friend suggested he choose his own conception
of God. That idea has allowed AA to work in all cultures, all
denominations and even with the nonreligious.
But
these principles are clearly Christian and for my part, I can't come
up with a better concept of God than Jesus Christ. Sure, I can
conceive of God in ways that are more in line with my desires: a
cosmic soft-hearted grandfather in whose eyes I can do no wrong, who
forgives readily and makes no demands on me or my life. But that kind
of God would be an enabler, someone who lets me continue to indulge
in habits that are destructive to me and others. I need someone who
will not let me get away with my B.S. Jesus had no patience with
hypocrisy and even when he forgave people, Jesus never said “Go and
sin some more.”
I also
need a God who understands my life, the stresses and influences and
temptations I must deal with daily. Jesus can because he became one
of us, from birth to death. When I go to him with the stuff that I
face, he knows firsthand what I am talking about. Knowing that Jesus
had to deal with work and family and taxes and all the rest of
everyday life and that he still stay focused on serving God and doing
his will helps me do the same.
I also
need a God who is not merely an adviser and guide but who can get
hands-on. For some medical problems, drugs, diet and lifestyle
changes alone aren't enough. Sometimes you need surgery. I need a God
who can get inside me and fix what's broken. I still need to follow
his orders but without him making those internal changes first, I
would be like someone trying to treat appendicitis through diet and
exercise. If I don't let the surgeon remove the inflamed appendix,
eventually it will burst and all my diet and exercise will do is make
me the most physically fit corpse in the morgue.
The
best conception of the God I need to fix my irrational,
self-generated problems, to undo the bad habits I have built into my
brain, is Jesus. He loves me and forgives me and won't let me
continue in my self-destructive ways. He gets me and he can get into
me. He will make me into a better person no matter how hard it is for
me. Or how much it hurt him. As far as he is concerned, my sins died
on that cross with him. Now I have a new life. His life. And I'm
going to let him do with it whatever he thinks is best.
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